Common conditions that share symptoms with grief

The standard advice is that grief is hard on your physical and mental health so feeling awful in the early days is normal. When we ask how long before we can expect to stop feeling awful, we’re told that it’s different for everyone.   There is a world of good intentions in this advice. It’s…

Try this

In 1988, psychologist James Pennebaker asked 50 university students to write about either something traumatic or something unimportant, for fifteen to twenty minutes, for four days in a row. Their health and visits to their doctor were measured six weeks after the writing exercise. The researchers found that students who had written about something traumatic,…

A big week for bereavement phone-ins

Tonight BBC1 will broadcast footballer Rio Ferdinand’s documentary about raising three children after being widowed.   This week bereavement is a talking point on radio shows and in the press. As always, many bereaved people taking part say that what helped them most was hearing from other bereaved people. We couldn’t agree more so we’ve…

Undone by technology

I need to cancel my membership of a group. It was a fun thing to do with my husband but without him it would be too dull for words. I should do it today before another year’s fees are removed from my bank account.   I dig out the membership renewal letter that arrived last…

Make it easy on yourself

Make it easy on yourself   Getting the wording right for official letters about tricky situations is difficult at the best of times. At the worst of times it doesn’t bear thinking of. If only you had a personal assistant. Well we’ve found the next best thing.

One bit of good news if grief has left holes in your memory

The best friendships are between people who rely on each other to remember the things they’ve shared. This is the finding of a study reported in The British Psychological Society’s Research Digest.   We know that many couples have interconnected memory systems. This is another of the big and rarely mentioned losses of widowhood. But…

No gym kit required

150 minutes is the new five a day. Actually, you should be doing it in addition to eating five portions of fruit and vegetables per day.   NHS guidelines for adults aged 19-64, say we should be doing at least 150 minutes of moderate aerobic activity, plus strength exercises on two or more days –…

Learning lots

When grief first sends you crashing to the floor, you are well aware that you’re down. You also know in detail the effort that goes into rearranging every fibre in your body to stand up again.   Later, when you’re not expecting it, it can take a while to work out why you’re not managing…

Do your analytic friends understand you better than your intuitive friends?

We’ve all experienced the semi-professional port in a storm. That person you barely knew who at the first sign of crisis was suddenly in your life, trying to soothe you like a child. They seemed very much in touch with their own feelings and said they perfectly understood your feelings… and maybe you’re currently screening…

Career breaks

According to the TUC and ACAS, modern employers are increasingly seeing time off as a way of rewarding and retaining employees.   If there was ever a trend to get in on early, this sounds like the one.   A career break is different to sick leave, where a doctor determines that you shouldn’t be…

Six quick ways to beat your security fears

Start 2017 by taking action to protect yourself. The free resources below will help you feel more in control of your life.   Your local police force will have crime prevention officers. Phone your local station and they’ll be able to arrange for someone to visit you at home and give you free advice. They’ll…

25 more ways to meet new people

Part two of our big list of ways to bring more people into your life. From finding people who really get your interests to homeshares, car shares and tracing distant relatives, there are many ways of connecting with people if you’re willing to reach out.   1. Open University is just one of the many…